I'd like to dedicate this post to R.E.M.

I would like to take this moment to share with you something very special.  Something that I care very deeply about.  Something that changed the way I view the world and myself.

Alpine Slides.

Kurt and Harper riding up the mountain.

I know, I know.  Amanda/ Mandy we already know all about Alpine Slides and the spiritualism of such a ride, where have you been.  I know, right!  For those very few who don't know it is a slide so high you take a ski lift to get to the top of the MOUNTAIN.  Then after you sign a waiver you get into a plastic "sled" with a brake between your legs, say a prayer, kiss the children one last time then hurl yourself down a track made of concrete.  We drove into the mountains on Saturday to see some fall foilage and beautiful scenery when we happened upon Heritage Square and their glorious claim to fame.

If there is a patch, I need one.  Cause baby, momma gonna find and ride every alpine slide available.
Seriously, when you come visit I will take you to my new chapel and you will be converted!


A video.

Sorry I would have recorded more but I had to hold the pee in and the brake at the same time, the video camera had to go.

9-11

9-11 by Harper Workman

Harper on 9-9-01

The date: September 6, 2001. My dad and I flew out from Portland, Oregon, to Billings, Montana, to visit my Grandpa, who lived in Casper, Wyoming. At the time, I was only two years old. Our flight back to Portland was scheduled on September 11, 2001. We were camping in Grandpa’s old camper, which was full with mice. On that Tuesday morning, I was fishing when Grandpa got the call. He had to go up onto a little hill, so he could get better reception. When his call was finished he said:

            “Well, Grandma says they blew up New York,” to which my dad replied,

            “What do you mean, they blew up New York? WHO blew up New York?”

            My grandpa had no idea, so we jumped into the car, and drove to a nearby town called Custer. Custer was a strange place. There was absolutely nobody outside. It was pretty early in the morning, but still, it was a bit creepy.

            We pulled into a gas station, and walked inside. Behind the counter stood a small green refrigerator, and on top was a TV with the news on it.  We sat down to watch as they played a recap of the second plane hitting, and the South Tower crumbling to the ground. We all sat, dumbfounded, even me, a tiny two year old. It seemed even I knew that something awful had happened.

            We drove over to my Great Grandma’s house, in Laurel, Montana. We called up our airline, United, but needless to say, our flight back home was, “canceled until further notice,” which was devastating to us. All we could do to entertain ourselves was watch the news. After four days of getting denied by United, we finally got a call saying that our flight was on Friday afternoon. That was on September 15, 2001.

            Our cousin, my dad’s first, and my second, drove us over to the airport. When we got there, it was a mad house. Everyone in the entire state, it seemed, was at the airport. We learned that our flight had been delayed for about three to four hours. After sitting in an overcrowded airport, our flight arrived, but the pilots (of course), had to rest because they had been on duty too long. So another three hours later, we finally got on our plane, and got back to Portland, but it was too late for Mom to pick us up. We had to take a taxi to get back home, and when we did, Mom burst into tears.

            Even though it such a huge ordeal for us, it was nothing compared to what others were feeling. We had to put ourselves in the shoes of the people who had died, and their families. And when we got home, we were just happy to be together, which was more then what 3,000 other families had. 

Summer Camp Part II - Future Smartasses of America at Camp Lotta Ha Ha

Lots of parents raise their kids with the hope, and maybe even expectation, that they'll be the future leaders of our nation. I guess I can see where they're coming from - we need politicians and captains of industry to keep this big ol' machine a humming. These parents use examples like Bill Gates and Barack Obama to illustrate to their kids that it doesn't matter where you come from, you can make a difference in the world.

These are fine examples to look up to - even if you're an Apple fanboy or a raging teabagger - who wouldn't want their kid to be the richest man in the world or the PUSA? Well, us for one. We tend to idolize a different sort in our house. We look up to John Stewart, Louis Black and George Carlin. Yes we need future leaders of America but we also need future smartasses to make fun of those future leaders.

Harper and Ainslee both are already world class ball-breakers and to tell you the truth, I couldn't be more proud. So when I saw the local comedy club, Comedy Works, offering a weeklong comedy camp for kids I couldn't register Harper fast enough.

From 9 a.m. to 3 p.m., Monday through Friday, Harper studied his butt off learning how to write jokes and put a decent three-minute set together. Then on Saturday afternoon the kids performed their acts in front of a packed house of parents, friends and creepy adults who just seemed to want to watch little kids on stage.

The comedian in charge of the camp was a guy named Phil Palisoul, which you can watch here on "The Tonight Show", http://youtu.be/BSsyxxUs-48. He told us repeatedly what a great writer Harper was, but seemed worried about him "finding his voice." He kept telling us to watch comedians like Steven Wright and Mitch Hedberg. "See, they're also quiet but somehow managed to stand on stage and say stuff for a few minutes," he said.

Amanda and I were way more nervous than Harper and in the end he in fact did manage to stand on stage and say stuff for a few minutes. So here's the result of all the comedic hand-wringing. Enjoy!

Summer Camp...part 1

We made a bit of money on the sale of our house in Washington so we decided to spend some of it on the kids.  You know, instead of doing something mature and responsible like painting a General Lee flag on Kurt's truck ala Duke's of Hazard.

To be honest we are also still trying to bribe the kids into to thinking that moving was the best thing we could possibly do.  We aren't going to win any parent of the year contests, so we thought "hey how's a simple bribe gonna hurt our track record."
So we asked the kids what would their dream activity be?
Ainslee:  Horse riding camp
Harper:  Comedy camp
So Kurt, who although I'm the librarian in the house does the majority of the compulsive research, found both camps.  The cost was high, but the experience will be forever a great memory for both the kids and us.  I also think we found their true passions  We will continue to help them pursue it so that we may live vicariously through them.

I can't possibly explain to you how amazing it was to see my little baby girl up on that big horse named Blue.  I came back the first day of camp a bit early to see if I could  catch her riding.  On the FIRST DAY she was up on that horse like a natural.  I was giggling.  She was so happy, so brave, so not my baby but a little lady.

Kurt and I absolutely did NOT pressure our kids in these choices, but both of them were dreams of ours too.  It was so much fun to watch and participate as the doting parent.  She put on a horseshow with the other campers to show what they learned.  I love seeing her little feet kick that horse to trot.

Thanks Academy Stables!

Part 2...Harper's comedy genius!

Rev it Up! 4-Wheel-driving the mountains of Colorado

Old slough used for mining.

So, my dear friend Gayle gave me a delightful book Guide to Colorado Backroads and 4-Wheel Drive Trails as a going away present.  I was actually very excited about this book since my husband is 1 part city boy, 1 part BBQ master, and 27 parts "backroads and 4-wheel-drive trail lover."

We were looking for a mountainy thing to do this weekend, especially to get away from the 100 degree weather, so we turned to Gayle's present.  This book categorizes trails as Easy, Moderate, and Difficult. Since the descriptions on most of the Difficult trails included terms like "probable roll overs and body damage"  we decided to try the trails marked Easy then work our way to the death trails.

We followed the Snake River a lot of the way, but this is a
creek that we had to cross twice.

However, according to the book Chihuahua Gulch trail looked amazing even with it's Moderate rating and TWO water crossings.

To be honest I'm not a huge 4-wheeling hobbyist.  I never saw the temptation of riding around rocks and cliffs while being tossed around the cab of a pick up like an old yogurt container. The kids and Kurt LOVE it so I usually just went along.  I was so clinched that I feel I ran a marathon instead of sitting in John Rambo (Kurt's truck).

Harp in John Rambo.

Yet after this trip I am hooked.  The scenery was breathtaking.  The thrill of water crossings and riding the edge of cliffs is like the ups and downs of a rollercoaster.  Next time we are finding one with a campsite and maybe even THREE water crossings.  It's an amazing way to see the glorious mountains of Colorado.

And if you don't buy it, just look at the pictures:

Indian Paintbrush

View from the top!

This is one of the wildflowers  we saw along
the trail.  Rocky Mountain Columbine
(the state flower).

One of the water crossings.  When we waded through it
reached up to Kurt's knees.  This did not deter my mighty
4-wheel companions.

Lakeside Amusement Park

While our cousins came over to see us all the way from Georgia, we were stranded at our house, trying to find something to do. We nearly hung ourselves, when I remembered a little amusement park called “Lakeside Amusement Park.” Built in 1908, it's only 2 miles from our house so we decided to set off right away, and after a short car trip, we reached the parking lot and paid the 2 dollar admission. After purchasing our tickets to the rides, we each set off. I spied a go-cart track, and immediately headed over. It was just a circular track with four carts and I swear they go at least 20mph. It was my favorite ride.  

               

There were two roller-coasters, and they were pretty fun. One roller-coaster was a traditional, 6 car, two-person-per-car, metal-track, roller-coaster.  What about the other one?  Its name was The Wild Chipmunk, which should tell you what decade it came from, and it was the weirdest roller-coaster I have ever seen. It’s just one-car, and you can only fit two people in that car. This ride was NOT fun. You feel like you’re going to fly off the track, and that’s before the first actual hill.

               

Next, we headed over to the area with the “Zoom.” And that’s basically this park’s version of the Panic Plunge. I was too scared to go on, but everyone else went on at least once. It wasn’t very fun for my Mom, who was crying the whole time.

After the Zoom, I went over to the Bumper Cars, which were definitely the best bumper cars I ever been on. You could only go one way, and they were FAST! After crashing into Mom a few hundred thousand times, the rain picked up, thus concluding our visit. All in all, it was a lot of fun.

Do I Sense a Chaaallennnge?

The ten minute walk with ten bucks lunch challenge

There are so many excellent looking restaurants in the Berkeley neighborhood we decided to throw down a $10 lunch challenge to see who could get the best lunch in our ‘hood for ten bucks or less. We figured it would not only help us decide on a new lunch spot for the fam, but also allow us to try 4 new restaurants. All of the restaurants were on Tennyson Street except for Tacos Jalisco, which is on 38^th, and are no more than a ten-minute walk from our house.

We started the challenge with Amanda’s choice at Swing Thai, .2 miles away from our house – about a five minute walk.

Walking in we noticed it very clean and classy with a modern Asian feel – in other words, no cheesy paper lanterns or metal chairs with red vinyl seats. We were greeted by a smiling hostess and seated immediately. The rest of us sat around like a bunch of sad-sacks while Amanda decided what to order. She decided on the Pad Thai and while it took quite a while to prepare, it was extremely hot and fresh when it arrived.

Amanda said it was the best Pad Thai she’d ever had. It had a nice hint of peanut and unlike most pad thai, was not overly sweet. She did order the mild and it could have used a little more kick – next time she’ll try medium.

Next we moseyed our way across the street to the Cozy Cottage. It was also .2 miles from home and google maps said it would have only taken us four minutes to walk here.

We were met at the door right away and Ainslee decided she wanted to sit outside. It was starting to get a little hot out, so the hostess moved a table into the shade for us.

This place had a huge menu, with tons of options under ten bucks. Ainslee narrowed it down to two options, the Cozy Blintzes with fruit and cream cheese and a classic cheeseburger. After a protracted pros and cons session – longer than death-row inmates take to decide on a last meal – she went with the burger.

The burger was big and dripping with juices, Harper (who was looking a little famished by this point) said it made him start foaming at the mouth. The burger had a big, beefy flavor that tasted more like a homemade patty than a bland restaurant hockey puck. Ains loaded it up with tomatoes, onions and lettuce and dug in, juices running down her chin the whole time.

Harper and I were feeling peckish by this point and couldn’t wait to dig in to our own lunches. Harper chose DJ’s Berkerly Café, which we mentioned in an earlier blog post. It was .4 miles and 8 minutes from the homestead.

DJ’s is a breakfast and brunch place, with lunch items limited to a few sandwiches. Inside, the exposed brick walls and humming duct work overhead give it a relaxed, loft feel and I can imagine this place being popular in Portland.

The waitress remembered us from our earlier visit and was as perky and Rachel Ray-like as ever. Harper went with the strawberry stuffed French toast, which is sort of a misnomer because it’s actually stuffed with strawberry cream cheese.

This was definitely the best tasting meal of the challenge. The French toast was deliciously sweet, without being cloying and the tangy cream cheese inside kicked it a few rungs up the flavor ladder.

By this time I was hungry enough to, as my step-dad from Maine likes to say, “eat the ass-end of a skunk and use his tail to wipe my face.”

We walked around the corner from DJ’s to Tacos Jalisco, also .4 miles and 8 minutes from Casa de Workman.

Walking in was like walking in to a restaurant that had been frozen in time in 1974 and was just thawed by a team of paleontologists. The cheesy décor, the placemats that try to make us bilingual, the booths that were a little to close and a little too high. Needless to say, I loved it.

I ordered the taco plate with two steak tacos and two tongue tacos. The waitress, who was a little surly but showed a lot of cleavage so I didn’t mind, brought us a basket of warm tortilla chips and an assortment of delicious salsas.

My tacos arrived steaming and sizzling, each one on two little corn tortillas – just the way they’re supposed to. They were very basic, meat, onions, cilantro and a lime to squeeze over the top. The steak tacos were a little more flavorful and tender than the tongue, but both were excellent.

The Winner

So, this challenge did have a winner and a loser. We devised a complicated criteria consisting of eight elements ranging from taste and presentation to price and distance from home. We assigned points in each category and chose the winner based on the results.

First place – Cozy Cottage

A combination of atmosphere, service, choices and distance from home made this the narrow victor.

Second Place – DJ’s Berkeley Café

Great service and delicious food made this a tough decision.

Third place – Swing Thai

Good atmosphere, excellent food and proximity to home made this an excellent choice.

Fourth Place – Tacos Jalisco

I totally lost it when I ordered the tongue tacos. The kids were too creeped out to give it high scores.

Winners – us!

For having so many excellent food choices within walking distance of our house.  The best part was freaking out the wait staff when only one of us ordered and the rest of us looked on drooling.